Blogging Bond

Todd Alcott, screenwriter, watched every single Bond movie and blogged it all. My favorite section so far: challenging his readers to upstage the title “Octopussy.”

The task, I admit, was harder than it appears to be. I asked that the proposed titles include the Latin form of a number, a pun, and a vulgar term for genitalia. My own admittedly limp (sorry) entry, Septemember, barely meets these criteria. uthuze’s Pentacock is strong, although the punning jump from “pentagon” to “pentacock” is a little dodgy. Univag is better, but from where I’m sitting (no pun intended) “vag” is by no means a common term.

mcbrennan provides a number of creative examples, including the multi-punning (or would that be “punani-ing?”) Pi-hole (hyphen mine) and Quartermasturbator (a Bond Villain named Quartermastubator really sets the screenwriter’s wheels in motion).

But the winner, after much consideration is urbaniak’s Triceratits. “Tits” is not, strictly speaking, a vulgar term for genitalia (rather, a secondary sex characteristic) but the combination of Latin number, pun, vulgar sex term and a name for an animal provides the extra edge needed for a sound commercial title on the level of Octopussy.

Bear in mind when reading his excerpts that Alcott often changes his “read more” links to something more witty.

Tag: James Bond [Todd Alcott's Livejournal via MeFi]