Ultimate Fighting Championship: An Introduction

We would be remiss in our coverage of this week’s fighting theme if we didn’t mention the Ultimate Fighting Championship, loathed by many yet still growing larger and more profitable every year. If you’re one of the folks who remain unfamiliar with the UFC—intentionally or not—you might consider making an exception and tuning in to Spike TV tonight at 8:00 Eastern to watch Tito Ortiz and Ken Shamrock beat the holy living hell out of each other in what should be the final bout between two fiercely bitter rivals.

For UFC newbies, a little explanation should help your enjoyment of the event. First of all, if you are expecting kung fu action movie stunts, well, don’t. Most of these guys have studied several styles of martial arts (referred to as Mixed Martial Arts, or just MMA) and almost always the UFC bouts end up on the floor with the contestants grappling for position in a jiu-jitsu style wrestling match.

To the untrained eye, it can look a lot like a couple buff, half naked guys trying desperately to fuck each other while keeping themselves from being fucked by their opponent. Eventually one of the competitors will jockey himself into a position where he can punch the living daylights out of the other. Often this involves actually knocking the guy unconscious and/or lots and lots of blood.

The Ortiz and Shamrock rivalry goes back to around 1999, with Tito Ortiz winning both of their previous matches. Shamrock is ten years Ortiz’s senior, and few people seriously think Shamrock has any chance. It’s actually one of those shameful sort of attempts to reclaim one’s past glory that almost universally end in failure and embarrassment. Should be a great show! – Ryan Ashmore