Hair Products For Men, Volume 2: Goop

Hairspray: In a nutshell, it’s aerosol-delivered glue, seldom used for anything other than sealing in a perfect style achieved with other products. If you sweat with this on your hair, and it runs in your eyes – and it will – life can suck. Nevertheless, it’s available in a wide variety of strengths, from light hold to super ultra maximum mega ultimate Xtreme hold. Some is available in colors over Halloween, but unless you’re platinum blonde and the lighting is great, nobody will be able to tell.

More sticky goo after the jump.

Mousse: Light, moveable hold, easily dispersed, and fun to use, mousses work best on slightly wavy hair and/or fine hair to increase body and build volume. Not especially useful for shorter looks, but give it a shot anyway. Simply release a foosball-sized amount in your hand and rub palms together, then work through hair front to back. Avoid using too much, as the idea is light hold that moves and looks dry. Very blow-dryer-friendly; use with a sturdy, vented brush that doesn’t have tightly packed bristles, or better yet, just fingerstyle. There are many different sorts of mousse out there, some that have extra shine product, some that are meant to infuse your hair with lost vitamins, but all do a reasonable job at controlling frizz. Many invoke curls, be careful if this is not a desired effect. The girlier stuff has a lot of scent and even glitter infused within it; avoid at all costs unless you roll like that. Use only on damp or dry hair; used on wet hair it’s practically useless.

Crème: Don’t like that greasy or sticky feeling but still want light to medium hold, perhaps with some weight, looking to control some frizz or flyaway hair? Crèmes might be your best bet. Can be used on wet or dry hair with slightly different results. Today’s assortments target specific uses, such as scrunching for textured dry hair, shining dull or damaged hair.

Gel: Magic goop of a bygone year, though still in use with many folks, especially Eurotrash and those who wear Gotti hair, itself a tragic move. Incredible hold, works great with lacquer or sprays, but today’s looks generally don’t want that kind of stiffness. Used sparingly on dry hair, it’s still useful for light hold in a pinch, and it can be emulsified with other product, like paste and wax, to produce an effect neither has on their own. Builds up fast and breaks down while wearing, which causes dandruff-like flakes to accumulate on the hair and shoulders, kinda gross. Very good for men with long hair who need to keep it in a ponytail when it doesn’t all reach back to your elastic. Every goth over 35 has some and goes through it fast, take that as you will.