Thanks to the charity of a Dethroner reader, we’ve been thinking about “Drops,” a liquid post-splashdown toilet odor eliminator. If you predict or routinely present above average post-defecatory bouquet you can simply press a button, passing olfactory judgement from your personal throne of kings. (Despite the name of this website, we do recommend keeping a toilet around the house.)

A guy I used to work with made the entire office wish he’d buy this chair cushion that was filled with activated charcoal. I wonder if a package of Drops will show up without a word on his desk?