At first glance, I thought the “Pullitt” condom with attached handle was for giving yourself a pre-orgasm choke, the favored move of quick-triggered, bargain basement tantric yogis everywhere. (Not that I know anything about that! My oaken phallus, contained by a master cooper’s stoutest iron bands, will give up its jeweled pomegranate-like seed only when fired by steam catapult through a coven of virgins lined head to crotch on ten miles of steel rail.)

Turns out the Pullitt is for getting the condom on quickly, before you lower-case your Johnson. Come on, dudes, it’s not that difficult. Stop, pop, and roll. Or ask your parter to give you a mouth.

Product Page [PullittCondoms.com via Thrillist]