Golf: you love it or hate it. In fact, a lot of people who love it also hate it. It’s an insidious pursuit with many layers of competition—man vs. self, man vs. nature, man vs. other men, man vs. wallet—lacquered atop the underlying truth that it’s a pretty damned hard sport. Hard enough that you’re likely to either become obsessed with the game, or driven away from it altogether.

You may be in the latter camp, happy to live without golf. But many a non-golfer finds himself playing the game, at least occasionally, out of necessity. Golf is the sport of business, and it is an occupational hazard for many businessfolk like salespeople, doctors and lawyers, and many other professional-types who are invited to play in corporate outings, tournaments or fund-raisers. Golf is also a very social sport, and you may find yourself getting roped into playing as part of a family obligation—meeting your prospective in-laws, family get-togethers, group vacations, etc.

In both of the situations I’ve outlined, you don’t need to be a great golfer to make a good impression. But you do need the right tools to keep from looking like a doofus. Rolling up to the clubhouse of your boss’ country club wearing a pair of jeans and carrying a beat-up bag of department store clubs takes you down several pegs, and pulling out a set of dusty golf clubs that you bought at an estate sale for $10 won’t make your future father-in-law too secure about giving away his little girl to the likes of you.

As with many things, it’s better to look good than be good. Sad commentary on contemporary society? Perhaps. But if you’re existing on this plane of reality and you want to do your golf duty without looking like a dork, save your existential rants for the couch at Starbucks and get yourself some golf gear that makes a good impression for you.

This week’s theme will guide you through the process of getting what you need to play golf. We’ll tackle the different ways you can buy clubs and the other accessories you’ll need, whether you only need to play a couple times or whether you want to take up the game and get better at it. Should you buy your clubs new or used? How much should you spend? What about stuff like balls and shoes? Here to help is Donald MacKenzie of The Sand Trap. Donald’s been in the golf business since woods were made out of wood—and since Tiger Woods was in junior high—and he knows the ins and outs of the biz. He’ll help you to build a golf arsenal that will help you play better and look the part of the golfer, from head to toe, without looking like Rodney Dangerfield’s character from Caddyshack. Hey-o!

If you have a tip or a story idea for Dethroner, please feel free to send a tip or drop us a line on AIM, or just add it in directly to this week’s schedule on the wiki. (Edit password “hairclumps”.) In addition to theme-related links, we also welcome regular submissions to Ask Dethroner and Dapper or Crapper?. Upcoming themes are available for your perusal and suggestion on our Planning Commission Wiki.

(Photo: Digital Sextant’s Flickr stream)