Long the pariah of modern fashion, the formerly-reviled pleated front pants are gearing up for a comeback. You watch, I’ll put money on it if you don’t believe me. It’s been ten years or more of the flat-front pant and that spells long overdue in the fashion world. Some designer is going to have the stones to whip the pleats out. You might as well beat ‘em to the punch.

The argument is that, worn incorrectly, they can give a man a look that’s baggy in the wrong way—a condition known as diaper ass; the seat becomes far too loose , the pleats pucker, and the hips subsequently flair wide. Looks like the poor sap’s on the Depends. Not sexy. You can be in fabulous shape with an ass like a rock and 2% body fat; if you wear your pants wrong, you’ll look like you have ‘control issues’.

There are a few simple tips for avoiding this problem and the most obvious is to point out that pleated pants are meant to be worn high on the waist – not at the hips. Worn properly, the belt buckle should ride right around your navel. Subsequently, the generous material allotted for the pleats is given to the trunk length, so it falls instead of bunching up; this keeps the pleats lying flat and pointed to the floor instead of the horizon. Because of these lines, shorter guys who work the pleats tend to look taller; heftier guys look slimmer. Skinny and tall guys who wear them, however, look exceptionally good in them. Think Cary Grant in the ’40s, Sean Connery in Goldfinger, and Bowie’s Thin White Duke period (pictured).

Note that the crotch shouldn’t ride too low; if there is too much space between your taint and the crotch of the pants, you’re not only risking diaper ass, but you’re working your way toward a zoot suit look; arguably an interesting option, but that’s another post.

Even as the pants must be worn at the waist, they must also reach all the way to the shoes, breaking just a few inches above your ankle; under no circumstances may any sock be seen, ever, except when crossing your legs while seated. Also, pleated pants must always be cuffed; as the first pleat out from the center creates a line that should run all the way to the floor, the cuff’s weight will help keep the line sharp.

All clothing must fit correctly, but pleated pants are especially crucial in this regard. You should be able to comfortably fit two fingers in the waistband. You’ll know your pants are fitting properly if there is no bunching, the break is right, the waist is where it should be, and, perhaps most importantly, the front pockets keep closed. Nothing is quite as unseemly as pleated pockets pucking like hip-gills; if this is happening, you’re either wearing the pants too low or they’re cut all wrong.

Do be aware that, if you’re pairing your pleated pants with a sportcoat, it must be long enough to fall below the point at the waist where the front pleat turns into the leg crease. Generally, with suits this is a given, but when mixing and matching up articles of clothing, this must be minded.