As per last week’s post on the subject, I had plans this weekend to build a lamp out of a Barbie head. For some reason I was kind of intimidated by the idea. Electricity is a dangerous thing, and I’m rather accident prone; I really don’t like the idea of buring the house down or electrocuting myself. Looking back on the process, which took about seven minutes, I really need to be less of a wuss.

The first thing I did was read up about basic wiring, and thankfully Joel had already posted some pretty direct instructions on the matter. It seemed easy enough. Too easy, really. How could the process be so simple?

I decided to be daring and add a dimmer switch. It didn’t provide much challenge at all.

I felt that if it was this easy there was probably more to the deal than was apparent, so it seemed best to consult the professionals over at Just Bulbs at 5 W. 16th St. Even though they have no web site, I’ve walked past their dazzling window a hundred times and I finally had an excuse for going in and talking shop. Tony, the staff electrician, was quite helpful in listening to my questions and walking me through the assembly. It took him about thirty seconds to basically illustrate exactly the same thing that I’d already read about. He helped me pick out my gear and then let some flunky write up the order and forget to include one piece in my bag, which I later replaced at an Armenian hardware store for about three dollars less than Just Bulbs had charged me.

So I dump all the loot on the table. It wasn’t much, just a three piece switch kit, a threaded steel shaft, two nuts, a plug, and the dimmer, a shade, and a light bulb. And, of course, Barbie.

The hardest part was cutting the right sized hole in the dummy’s head and a second hole in the neck. Everything else was very simple. I attatched the cord to the contacts in both the plug and the switch, then spliced the cord in the middle, putting each end securely into opposite ends of the dimmer utility.

The tools I used only included a leatherman and a philip’s head screwdriver; everything else was like a Snap-Tite model kit.

It was all put together. The wiring to the switch was tight and everything else was a no-brainer. The trick was runnign the shaft into the head and locking the nuts against the inside and the outside of the scalp. With that, there was nothing left but to plug it in and hope that the damned thing didn’t explode or catch fire. I made sure botht he switch and the dimmer were shut off and plugged it into the wall jack. Nothing. I turned on the switch, still nothing. I slowly slid the dimmer up… and the 40 watt bulb slowly came on in return, ureka! I’m a master of electric engineering.

For my next amazing stunt, I’ll turn water into a solid with the aid of a freezer. Blindfolded!