Born from emo devotees, the new short hair often includes a part down the side. That’s right—we’re back to using combs. About.com, from whom we’ve stolen these images that they in turn have stolen from someone else, tends to be a pretty fantastic place to get a basic overview of the broad strokes of modern fashion. It’s ultra-generic, but that’s good.

For the longest time, I’ve done my hair in one of a couple variations on a high-and-tight, taking the longer bits in front, smearing them with a wax or pomade when damp (but not wet), then shaping the whole mess into a wedge to get the basic desired shape. Later, when my hair dries, I will break up the crusty spikes, then with just the slightest amount of water on my hands make sure everything is in place. It’s not the quickest method—leaving the house with my hair wet means I’ve got about an hour of really dorky super-spikes—but it has seen me through thick and thin. Perhaps, I thought, I could simply spice it up with a part down the side.

Turns out, nope, that didn’t work at all. Seems the high-and-tight prevents the hair below the part from doing anything but flying up and around at odd angles, while the hair on top emphasizes my flat, table-like skull. Looks like I’ll need a bit more hair all around before I can try to put something like this together—and I suspect more hair on my head, especially done up, will just make my huge noggin look huger.

The point? Always try new hairstyles on a holiday, when no one else is around. Also: try the part. I haven’t quite got it figured out yet, but it seems like a useful style to have in the library, especially if you can crack a smile, something male models are genetically engineered to be unable to do.