Clove Cigarettes: Not Suitable for Anyone
Published by Joel November 6th, 2006 in Smoking. Share This
Clove cigarettes are a mixture of about 70% tobacco and 30% clove, the very same cooking spice used for ciders and hams. In addition to the nicotine from the tobacco, the cloves release a chemical called eugenol that can “numb the throat and impair the gag reflex,” misleading some to presume that clove cigarettes are best when an appetizer before smoking cock. Instead, “cloves” are the predominate cigarette of Indonesia, their country of origin, where they are charmingly, onomatopoeically referred to as “kretek,” for the sound the cloves make as they burn.
They are often smoked in our country as presumptuous affectations by douchebags, who choke down the acrid smoke in a pretense of enjoyment simply because cloves both smell interesting and are offten wrapped in black or brown paper. (If Marlboro sold a variety of cigarette wrapped in jet paper and smelling of fingernail polish, clove consumption would drop to nearly zero.)
Cloves are generally regarded as more harmful than regular cigarettes, although the dramatic “lung bleeding” hasn’t been shown to be any more pronounced than after smoking only tobacco. (Anecdotal evidence suggests, however, a sharp uptick in bleeding from the wrists.) They have been shown to deliver more nicotine, tar, and carbon monoxide than traditional cigarettes.
I’m sorry—you may think they’re the tastiest treat in creation, but like all-black wardrobes and belts make of skulls, they’ve been too-far sullied by “mysterious” twats to be smoked anywhere other than the privacy of your own basement lair.
If you must smoke something other than a cigarette, try bidis (bee-dees), tiny cigarettes wrapped in a tendu leaf and tied with a bit of string. They’ll still kill you up just as fast as a clove cigarette, but they’re just barely less pretentious and come in flavors more suited to your teenage palate, like chocolate and “not tobacco.”
I smoked cloves for a couple months when I was a teenager, until I started to notice a trend in the other people who were smoking them. Back to Camels for me!
My enjoyment of clove smokes is completely unsullied by my insecurities about how i appear.
wow, what a shitty angry douchey post.
Clove smoking is for fags! It’s little twats who want to make the “unknowing” think they are smoking something illegal. I hope all clove smokers have black lung by time they’re 22 and die a horrible death!
Whoa jimbo, wimmen read these posts…watch where you swing that “twat” stuff.
Although, I totally agree…but…
Did I read this right?
” misleading some to presume that clove cigarettes are best when an appetizer before smoking cock”
WTF?!
I smoke cloves (original, not anything flavored) and I like them for how they taste. The brown paper has brown sugar on it so theres a bit of a sweet taste, not so you can look like you’re smoking something illegal. And sure, they are more toxic than cigarettes but if you’re going to die of lung cancer, you’re going to die of lung cancer.
I smoke cloves because I like the sweet aftertaste. If you’re basing your choice of whether or not to take up a certain habit on whether or not it is practiced by “pretentious people,” “fags,” “twats,” or whatever, you have a slightly bigger problem to worry about than lung cancer, in my opinion. I tend to smoke them in private, not because I’m embarrased of them, but because I enjoy them more when I’m relaxing at home, and out of respect for other people who may not be fans of the spicey smell (or smoke in general).
I have never heard anyone (male or female), even my most open friends, mention anything about smoking them prior to giving anyone head, and I’m wondering where that even came from in the article, much less how it relates to any logical reasons why someone shouldn’t smoke them. If anything, i would think that would encourage some people (both male and female) to start smoking them just to see if it helps after all. If you really want to use the lack of gagging as a discouraging thing, maybe you should mention wht your linked site did: that a reduced gag reflex can increase your chances of choking on food and drink because it makes it easier for things to go down the wrong pipe.
If you honestly think that cloves smell–or look–like “something illegal,” you either have a very lacking sense of smell, or you have lived a very shleterd life and thus have no clue what anything illegal actually smells like.
If you took the time to actually read that, much less to consider it, you are a better person than most. I am guessing that about 99% of you will have stopped reading as soon as you saw that I smoke cloves.
I’ve been smoking cloves for 2 years now and i wouldnt smoke anything else. My girlfriend smokes one with me on occasion and she really enjoys the taste. When i do smoke in public i generally get compliments about how the clove aroma is so much better than a normal cigarette. I have never had anyone complain about my smoking cloves. I smoke all brands and all flavors. I can hardly stand to smoke a regular cigarette anymore. All you haters out there have probably never even tried a clove or Kretek. “Cloves” have about 70 percent tobacco and 30 percent cloves and are just as harsh as a regular cigarette. I am just an average 37 year old man who enjoys smoking cloves. I work as a journeyman pipefitter @ a papermill. If you enjoy it do it and to heck with you who think I care about your opinion.
Oh I almost forgot!! Hey JIMBO smoke this bitch!!!!
Well here it is, another useless artical written by some damaged goods with a keyboard. What a shame. smoke what you will at your own will without the worry of some meaningless, mind fucked retard telling you that your an emo, fag, or a douche. the guy who wrote this was probably sitting on a beanbag naked eating cheatos and beating off to gay porn himself… just a wild guess…
Joel…and Jimbo. I could write a book about how pathetic and full of shit you both are, but you wouldn’t read it. Probably because you’re too fucking stupid to read. Haven’t you heard? People who write opinionated bullshit on the the internet like dick…it’s science. Just like smoking cloves automatically makes someone a homosexual. as long as we’re on the topic of homosexuality, maybe the two of you should pair up. Joel and Jimbo…sounds like a faggot match made in heaven if you ask me. Fuck your little article, fuck your so called “facts”, fuck your smartass wishes of death upon others, fuck the rest of your obscure and ridiculous opinions, and most importantly fuck you. Get your goddamned heads out of ur fat, cock-hungry asses. You both fucking suck.
I just started smoking clove cigarettes. I only smoke them when I am stressed out and need to free everything from my mind… so about every 2 days or so… I don’t think they seem that bad for you but obviously they are. They are illegal in the state I reside but you can still find them in tobacco stores if you ask for them. I love the smell and taste of it. Its alot better then cigarettes and I dont really give a crap what people say about it. Its my choice what I smoke and what I put in my body.
i’ve smoked two kerteks in my life time -0- Trad. smokes and i have to say that cloves are decent. if you use them to accent beer or whisky or any other type of drink you might enjoy….
as far as smoking cloves make you gay or a homo i’d have to disagree, i am 25 years old. married to a women (like it should be) and enjoyed the clove. just like typical Nascar fans when Toyota entered the cup race they are afraid of something new that doesnt break any laws….one of the days they will admit that change is a way of life….