Ghoulish? My Dog’s Skeleton Hoisted Eternally in Regal Display
9 Comments Published by Joel October 25th, 2006 in Dogs. Share This
I recently stopped a dinner conversation cold with my proclamation that I would, after my bulldog Porter’s demise, like to have his skeleton mounted. Everyone around the table at King Yum paused to stare at me while I quickly tried to shore up my position.
“It’s not like I want him to die,” I reminded them. “I’m just saying, when he kicks off, I bet he’ll have an interesting skeleton.” No one seemed to find my outlook on Porter’s future remains to be healthy.
“It’s kind of morbid to be thinking of that already,” said one dinner companion. “When he gets older you’ll feel differently about getting him stuffed.”
“But I’m not going to get him stuffed,” I qualified. “I want to have them put his body in an aquarium and have those little beetles eat off his flesh then have his bones bleached and strung together with wire.” My girlfriend was aghast, which is her default response to almost anything I suggest, but this worse than even the time I alluded to the possibility of female anal orgasm.
“It’ll go in my den,” I promised, quickly adding that I would also be purchasing a house with a den, or at least a bolt-on, building-expanding den module for our Brooklyn apartment.
So maybe dinner with new acquaintances wasn’t the time to bring up my plans of disposing and displaying Porter’s mortal remains, but I ask you: Is wanting to display my dog’s interesting skeletal structure strange? It’s not that I don’t love him—to death!—but when he’s gone he’s gone, and his hideously deformed skull would serve as loving tribute.
In the den.
English bulldog skull image courtesy of Skulls Unlimited.
I love how “It’ll go in my den” seems to make the whole thing perfectly acceptable. Before now, I hadn’t even considered how much I need a den for just this sort of thing.
And yes, I would totally do the same thing. Maybe have it hung from wires like a marionette, too.
I’ve always considered just making a necklace from the teeth of my dead pets. Hopefully by the time I’m 40, it will be an illustrious neck-piece with an array of beaks, teeth, claws, fur pieces and finally a cat skull in the center. Needless to say, I wouldn’t wear it often… Just on special occasions like my wedding night.
I think keeping the skeleton of your dog is a great idea. You clearly have a well-conceived notion of mortality and anyone who claims this as morbid is hanging on to the idea that All Dogs really do Go to Heaven. Disney is the morbid one here.
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While I don’t find the idea of keeping a skull or skeleton in itself morbid or disgusting I have reservations on keeping the skeletal remains of something that I loved and that loved me back as a show piece. I don’t believe in ghosts or spirits either but it just seems disrespectful to me. To love something for years and then when it dies to put it on display as an oddity to enjoy is not fair to the deceased, human, dog, cat or other. This is also why I disapprove of cremation and keeping the ashes on the mantle or in the china cabinet.
I’ve read about other pet lovers who have fluffy’s pelt turned into a pillow or something like it.
I don’t see anything wrong with it, Joel. It’s a tad eccentric, but we all know that while eccentricity may not be the spice of life… it is a good garnish.
i had my last dog cremated and put in a very nice urn, which has his name on it. i also have his collar around it. my current dog, who hopefully has more than a decade to go, will be cremated as well.
The thing about dogs, as any George Carlin fan knows, is that they all die. By the time you get in that last car accident, you will have had 10 or 20 dogs croak on you. And every time you forget to untie their leash from the bumper, you go out and get a new one. I see nothing wrong with keeping one of em around a little longer. Get some more use out of that dog, I’ll bet he wasnt cheap.
Dude, wanting the dog skeleton is totally normal, totally healthy. Live it up.
It’s a tad big to keep around, isn’t it? I could see a cat… but I’d figure you would trip over it regularly.