Get it? Because it’s eggs? Yeah, so it only took us about five seconds to come with that clunker of a headline, but we don’t get paid tens of thousands of dollars to write advertising copy like the chuckleheads who’ve scripted these punchlines to be inscribed via laser onto your hard-earned eggs. In case you can’t see the image because you’ve already plucked your eyes out of their sockets—the only sure-fire way to avoid food advertising until someone invents talking steaks—here’s a taste:

• CBS Mondays - Leave the Yolks to Us
• CSI: Crack the Case on CBS
• Shark - Hard-Boiled Drama
• CBS - It’s Harder to Get a Chicken Drunk Than You’d Think

CBS raids the henhouse for latest promotion [USA Today/AP]